All to often, those blasted creatures go bump in the night seeking to destroy innocent, helpless vampires. The heartless beasts roam through the catacombs and crypts of our fair cities looking for the poor creatures of the night in a hideous pogrom.

Their anti-vampire propaganda films like "I am Legend" and "30 Days of Night" frighten the children into thinking that these gentle souls are our enemies.

All they want from us is our life's blood, and my benevolent master assures me that it is only for the purpose of sustaining life. Who could possibly be against sustaining life?

So let us all unite with a single voice and decry the manufacture and sale of these kits, whose only purpose is to harm and destroy our Dark Overlords.

(thanks to The Art of Alex CF for the image that sparked the idea)